When I chat with my best friend....

Parental Guidance is advised...


Dan: why are there so many songs about rainbows??

me: and whats on the other side?

Dan: how are you i am climbing the fucking walls

me: the same
I need a job
BAD

Dan: rainbows are visions not only illusions..

me: i proctor all next week
and rainbows have nothing to hide

Dan: your tellin me..oh thats good I have the place to myself ..FINALLY!!

me:
yes but I am home for lunch

Dan: WOW can you cut a guy a break!!

me: I don't know the schedule but I will be out of your hair

Dan: Me and kitty need some time to get to know each other again!

*kitty is a stuffed cat*

me: I said to Mom that with you coming back I
I'll have to put plastic on the couch
kitty and I had a right snuggle watching james bond last night

Dan: har har hardy har har!!

me: we did!

Dan: I am sure that poor thing stinks of Santorum and loneliness

me: don't talk about W***e like that

Dan: and poppers...

me: kitty witnessed nothing that he hasn't seen already

Dan: pooooor kitty I am sure he wants to poke his eyes out!

2:34 PM

What did mommy say about me coming back finally

me: she's happy that I wont be alone
and she's happy that you'll be there to watch over me
and it's fucking freezing here - but Momma said it snowed a good foot in Calgary

Dan: oh lord tell her to cancel your ward..
and I will undo the straight jacket a little

me: she just loves us so
well these new pills aren't the best

Dan: well she doesn't show it through her visits!!

2:36 PM

me: so I have to discuss my dr pound when I see him paril 9
*april

Dan: what NEW PILLS??
and what are they NOT doing?

me: new pills - cipralex
for my GAD (general anxiety disorder)
but they aren't the greatest
I totally can't sleep and I don't want to be liza and take a pill to sleep and then one to wake up
:(

Dan: ;) ok Judy don't have me worrying about you!

me: no no - its just that my anxiety it thru the roof
its just $$
and that I have no future
LOL

Dan: sorry I had to watch bye bye birdie how lovely to be a woman anne margret!

2:40 PM

me: Groan

2:41 PM

Me: how do I nicely tell someone that the only reason I want to hang with you is so I can suck your c**k


10 minutes lapse


2:51 PM Dan: well, if you enjoy that part I don't think you need to tell them, just have some bum fun and move along he will either stay around for the fun or wonder why there isn't more? Does he have a nice house we can live in while he is away

me: no no this is someone else not ***

Dan: tell him your not ready for any serious commitment but still need to see him to have your hole stretched twice a week...ok What who know??
now..
lord your a busy boy..


2:54 PM

me: no no there is some guy who I ran into when I was really drunk...cute - but still I've seen him online and has a nice c**k but he's all boyfriend...this and bf that and I'm like shut up!!

Dan: so we've been told and some choose to believe it I know their wrong wait and see!!

me: (oh don't forget the song)

Dan: well tell him to come over f**k your face and you can chat about boyfriends some other time..

me: LOL
nah I don't even want that anymore...
he's all eech
and a loud talker
it hurts my ears

Dan: oo loud talker you do hate that!!
Ok I can't stand another day here I am going to just pay the full price for a ticket and get the hell out..hmm or maybe Fri night in Montreal and jump on the early train sat!

me: you are terrible
and a spaz
i thought you were there to visit mom?

Dan: well I say FRI NIGHT FRI NIGHT!! YIPPEEEE...go out with a bang I say!

me: you = retarded
i'm going to slip you a pill when you don't know it